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  • Writer's pictureClaire Malpass

30 hours of loneliness feels like a lifetime

I've been alone. Peeled my way out of situations to give myself chance to breathe, to recharge or restart and change perspective but I didn't think I would be alone again or ever feel abandoned.

Somewhat Disconnected and triggered into feeling the rush of negative emotions which over time have made me dependent of attention and anxious about situations and relationships where my desire for love, attention and affection has been abused . So much for me that I've felt that Stockholm syndrome affect towards people and longing for acception and seeking the love I think I truly must be worthy of - I mean I'd give anything for those closest to me .

I read this today ""scorekeeping" in interpersonal

relationships is correlated with anxious

attachment issues." I've become a huge scorekeeper because I've felt taken advantage of and my anxiety is the worst it's been for a whiles

Constantly giving in hope just a small amount is returned. Question is , what happens when I have nothing more to give .